December 2009
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Sherlock Holmes (12a)
Posted 21st December 2009

I can see the reasoning behind this cultural icon revitalisation. His popularity is enduring. There hasn’t been a big screen version for quite some time. Guy Ritchie is back-on-form and a Cockney-infatuated filmmaker. Robert Downey Jr. is bang-in-form and never more popular. Besides it worked for Batman and Bond so why wouldn’t it work for Holmes? Well...

Bondesque-by-design (opening in the middle of a mission before moving onto the films main narrative drive) but with a Pirates of the Caribbean playful feel to proceedings, this revisionist take on the legendary sleuth is tonally shoddy and unsure of what it really wants to be. Comedy? Action? Thriller? Detective Story? Bromance? How about all of these and more?

As you might deduce this leads it to be incredibly patchy. Coupled with the fact there’s also precious little in ways of storyline or overall plot cohesion – scenes and set-pieces are loosely strung together, ill-fitting like a jigsaw puzzle with its pieces forcibly jammed and involuntarily interlocked when perhaps they’re not meant to – you’re probably starting to get an impression of what’s not right about this revision.

Concentrated on the supernatural shenanigans of Lord Blackwood (a wasted Mark Strong on clichéd villain autopilot) and keeping the proper screen-presence of nemesis Moriarty (glimpsed throughout under a guise-hiding hooded cloak) back for any sequels should this be successful, Holmes (Robert Downey Jr.) and his faithful companion Watson (Jude Law) find themselves investigating a case of black magic after Blackwood somehow comes back from the dead (not a spoiler, it’s in every plot description available) to continue his incomplete and purposeful killing spree.

In the mix are some personal problems too: Watson is moving in with fiancée Mary Morstan (a really better than this part demands Kelly Reilly) much to Holmes’ (homosexual? Hinted at...) chagrin whilst the only woman to best Holmes’ head and heart, Irene Adler (an unfortunate Rachel McAdams in an entirely superfluous and thankless role, all the scenes she features in one of those forced pieces I mentioned earlier), is back in town causing trouble. Not that any of these machinations really add up to much, nor keep you from getting bored for large chunks of the film’s overlong two-plus hours running time.

What the whole shenanigans actually reminded me of is the derided Albert and Allen Hughes comic book adaptation From Hell. Perhaps because of the modern film techniques utilised within a period setting? Perhaps because of the visual stylistics of this darkly-gothic, foggy London period setting (kudos to the art department by-the-way for a great job)? Most obviously though perhaps because of Downey Jr.’s chosen method of portrayal for The World’s Greatest Detective™.

Sherlock by way of Sparrow (and a little Michael Prison Break Scofield weirdly), Downey Jr. literally nicks Johnny Depp’s shtick here almost verbatim. It’s very odd watching an actor who can wholesale make characters his own (Tony Stark / Kirk Lazarus / Paul Avery / Harry Lockhart / Charlie Chaplin) falling back and wholesale stealing somebody else’s acting gimmicks. On top of that (as if it wasn’t enough) it’s also extremely difficult to discern what he’s saying half the time, Holmes verbosely mumbling to himself almost inaudibly. It’s not my favourite interpretation of the character (not that I profess to be an expert or anything) and definitely not my favourite performance from Downey Jr. I’ve got to say.

That said when he is good is when sharing screentime and some excellent banterish buddy chemistry with Law’s Watson, who perversely is the best thing in the film by far. I’ve been verbal in my criticisms of Law in the past (Sleuth / All the King’s Men), but here I must doff my Deerstalker to him: he walks away with this film by bringing a level of comfortable chemistry to the table that it would have crumbled without. His 80s-buddy comedy style verbal sparring with Downey Jr.’s Holmes is undoubtedly the highlight of an otherwise largely dull film, whilst his Watson is the single identifiable and likeable character in the whole movie.

The only other area that Sherlock really delivers is in the direction, particularly the action-scenes. Here Ritchie really ups his game and shows he’s got the right stuff to do more than just replaying the gangster scene over-and-over. Big and bombastic, kinetic and energetic there are several well-choreographed scenes sprinkled throughout to perk you up just as your concentration beings to wane and your brain threatens to nod off. The best moments of which are when we catch a glimpse of Holmes’ minds eye at work and see how he envisions taking down his opponent blow-by-extreme-slo-mo-blow before the real super-fast takedown in real-time. It’s a clever twist that allows Ritchie to utilise his favoured slow-slow-really fast editing technique but also highlights in a non-expository way the intelligent, deductive reasoning of Holmes even in a time-sensitive situation.

It’s just a shame that this quantum leap forward for Ritchie is reined in by a rubbish script (reportedly there was a lot of improvisation between the leads which is where you’d imagine most of the humour came from) and a limp lead performance from a leading man who, up until this point, really seemed like he could do no wrong (since being revitalised himself in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang). Perhaps it’s a problem stemmed from the short production schedule that impacted upon script and character development time? Perhaps it’s a problem with the lacking in substance original story when there are so many rich existing ones to adapt? Perhaps it’s just a simple problem of miscasting or a misrepresentation of character in the lead role? Whatever the final prognosis though, there are definite misgivings about the whole pompous, plot-holed and somewhat silly affair.

Not that any of my personal reservations will amount to anything in the (almost certain) eventuality of Sherlock succeeding at the box office. Just off the back of the Downey Jr. factor, a lack of competition during a quiet Christmas release period and the enduring popularity of Holmes as a character. So the likelihood is we’ll see more. Hopefully though next time with a greater emphasis on a curious and compelling mystery to solve?

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